I just had explosive diarrhea in my work bathroom stall. Only, I didn’t realize, prior to sitting down, that it was already clogged. My normal shit sessions usually involve multiple flushes. But by my third flush, I looked behind me, horrified to see dark brown water almost to the top of the toilet bowl.

I jumped ship. I’m not even sure if I finished wiping my ass. But I definitely didn’t wash my hands. I got out of there as soon as I could to avoid anyone seeing me come out.

Only, someone did. Fortunately, there are 3 other stalls in there, and right now, all I can do is hope she doesn’t think the Code Brown stall was me.

FUCK.